In just a minute my precious sweet baby girl
It is amazing to me how so quickly seconds turn into minutes and minutes into hours and the hours into days and the days into a week and even more so all of that is so fleeting. It is amazing just how much I can fill or cram into my precious seconds, hours and days. I sometimes am baffled by just exactly how did I squeeze so much into my day. Other times I am perplexed as to just where did all my time go. I have contemplated how or why did I used my time or spend it in that way. I wonder was this a wasteful or worthy use of my precious time as a women, wife and mommy. I have to wonder the manner in which I spend my time or what I fill my time with if that is what influences whether the time I have is time well spent and or a day that got wasted and the type of day I have as a result.
As a mommy I find myself telling my daughter just a minute sweetie and it amazes me how often I catch myself saying that to her. Also I wonder what I fill those minutes with as a mommy would my daughter think it was a wasteful use or worthy use of those minutes that she had to hold on for. Yes, true asking our babies to hold on or wait for a minute while we do and handle the things we have to do as mommies can be invaluable and much needed lesson of patience or good thing some to those who wait and a part of growing up and maturing our babies. It also teaches we don’t get what we want when we want it and there is something lacking in instant gratification. Some would argue this is the sources of the biggest issue for kids and our society today. Although from my daughter’s perspective I wonder if she is puzzled by what I and how I use or chose to spend my minutes and days as a mommy. I know for me I find my self being puzzled by this and scratching my watch wondering how did the time get filled and get away from me. I mean I know how I spent my day doing dishes, cleaning, meal time, bath time, play time, laundry, play dates, appointments, homework (until recently) among numerous other things that fill my day but really where did it go and how did it get to be the end of the day already. I feel as if it was just 6:00am just 30 minutes ago. I must ask myself am I getting lost in the never ending to do lists, hustle and bustle, the busyness and the filling of all the ‘in a minute sweetie’ that I feel as its fleeting or passing me by like he sands of time being shifted through my life in the hours, days and weeks of motherhood
The answer to this question lies within how I spend or mange my time and what I as a mommy make priority for me as a women, as a wife and mommy and for my family. It is a constant struggle finding the balance and not get caught up and swept away by the busyness of being a mommy. I know different moms have different schedules, obligations or responsibilities, demands on them and their days, and needs or priorities so what one of mom choses for the use of her time would be different for another mom and from mother to mother. For example maybe the way a working mom has to use her time and prioritize would be differently form the way a mom who stays at home has to use her time and prioritize. For me when I was in school my two top priories for the use of my time was my family and school work and my house (sadly) was at the very bottom there just simply wasn’t enough minutes in the hours in my days in life as a mommy. Now not being in school my top two priorities are my family and writing and I do much better managing and juggling my household duties most of the time but not at the expense of my writing and certainly not at the expense of my family.
I have found as a mommy and through continuing my journey as a mommy there a few things that have helped me in balancing or managing the use of my time. For one thing as just with anything in life what absolutely has to get done or can’t be left undone or left to tomorrow then that needs to the focus and goest straight to the top of the priority list of the day. This was often the case when I was in school doing my graduate work I moved my priories around the pressing school declines and the rest to the next day. Also in realizing and understanding the most of the busyness and mommy to do lists aren’t going anywhere, unfortunately, and will still be here tomorrow awaiting me to give it my attention provide a great sense of freedom and relief of stress. What will not be here tomorrow are the precious, valuable and fleeting moment I had today that I could invest in my precious baby girl and family. This helped me in allowing myself to slow down, relax, give myself a break and focus on currently the more pressing matters of the day in front of me.
Also as simple as it may be or as much as I may say just allowing myself the freedom, time and space to take a step back, take a sip, breath and relax allows me to have a minute, worthy spending it on clear my head, get organized, get focused and go forth. Actually it’s probably one of the very best usages of my time worth spending for the simple fact that I got back and keep my sanity and catch my balance in the swirling and whirling of the busyness of life in motherhood. Also I was able to go forward in a more productive and efficient manner and make the most worthy use of my time if having given myself that time to take that sip, breathe, and go with my cleared and organized mind. In doing this it also helped me by saving thus able gain extra minutes to put to more worthy endeavors or purposes such as my daughter and my family that I was not spending my time on and wasting it spinning my wheels needlessly.
I also as a mommy found another tool or strategy in helping me figuring out and develop my discerning ability for what was an important use of my time and how to judge form minute to minute how to spend the time in my day. I make this specific distinction between wasteful use, worthy use or important use in context because prior I was discussing the duties, jobs, responsibilities or obligations we have as wives, women and mommies that are unavoidable. If there is no food in the house then someone is taking a trip to the store. If there no clean clothes for work or school the next day laundry better get done and if there are no clean dishes for cooking those dishes best get washed and dried. In this context I am addressing the houses of cards we wish to build and give to our babies and families often is designed and constructed through how we use, spend and what our time is devoted to. As people we often spend most of our time on what is most important to us. In spending our time as mommies we have to decide, choose and discern where we want our priories to be and where we want to spend our time. The answer for each of us to how we ‘spend our ‘just a minutes sweetie’s’ is often subjective up to the clock of the beholder. There is no right or wrong answer its up to the choices and how each mother and family discerns to spend her and their time and what is the best choice and use of her time. Also what priority is in the clock of the beholder can often change form day to day for any number of reasons or scenarios and that is okay. Trust me when my thesis was due or I working on for that whole semester and that was going to be the sole thing determined me earning, achieving my master’s and graduating not a lot else matter or there was time to get done for that four moths.
As mothers we should ask ourselves this question to find the answer for ourselves where do I want to have may priority lay at in how I spend and mange my time. We must judge what is worth filling our time with how to best use it and not waste and what we want to do with those minutes. We must be able to say this is a waste of my precious time not worth my time but this is every bit worth the grains of sand of my valuable time. In the building of my house of cards in my motherhood for me, my baby girl and family which design of house do I want to construct, demonstrate and present to my baby and family. In my own journey as a mommy and chasing what I want and desire for my baby and family is that in knowing how the weeks turn into months and months turn into the years that so quickly pass me by; I do not one day want to stop, look up, ask how all the sudden I went from saying ‘just a minute sweetie’ to wondering where did my day go but where did these years go and all sudden my baby is six before my eyes and then grown. In the passing of the seconds turning into minutes and minutes into hours and then days and then weeks, months and years like the grains of sand of time I never want to get lost in the minute to minute or keeping putting off for just a minute and have no regrets, longing of what could have been and to only be left with wondering where did all these precious grains of sand of time go. I want to have endless moments, days and years holding on, treasuring, savoring, cherishing these minutes and living in the moments in the minutes and not letting them pass me by to quickly and fleeting away. May we all strive to focus our time wisely and on worthy priorities as mommies for our babies and families. In doing this as mommies we will be able to look back and say we spend our precious grains of sand of time on things that were worthy of our precious time and that we cherish and treasure. The design of our house of cards of motherhood will reap the result of time wisely used, spent and given.