First, Foremost and Forever I am MaMA
Throughout my journey as a mommy it has most certainly and without any doubt has been most evident that in becoming a mommy and with motherhood everything absolutely completely changes. The total life altering and changing event of becoming a mom and the adventure of motherhood is so incredibly, profoundly, all encompassing that there is no going back and the change of motherhood is irreversible. This very idea of how profoundly, expansively and extensively our lives as women change when becoming moms is epitomized and embodied in that once becoming a mother, at least for me, I now and always will say first, foremost and forever I am now MaMa. This is a most immensely, paramount, transforming, bold and profound statement. I’m not even sure if we as women to include myself that we can even to begin to realized, understand and imagine the full, all encompassing influential impact of the reality and truth of that statement until we do in fact become MaMas and start our own individual journey into motherhood hand in hand with our babies. As we are all unique individuals and experience our own individual unique journey as mamas then what this profound statement and how we answer this most immensely significant question of what does this statement mean is just unique and individualistic to each of us as we are as individuals.
As I entered into motherhood and started my journey as a mama and as I learned, grew, evolved and changed as an individual, women, wife and mama I came to understand just how profound and influential this statement was. Also I was learning and experiencing how I was living this profound statement of now being first, foremost and forever I am MaMa. In a lot of ways in which I lived this statement and answered what this meant to me as a new mommy was through, or striving to and attempting, numerous aspects of motherhood that have been previously discussed such as, catching sleep, sips, snacks, soaks, sex and taking choses sips, breaths, breaks and my Me’Oclock time. Also I have strive for being balanced and centered, grounded and focused. You might be wondering how does all that equate to ‘First, foremost and forever now MaMa. For one thing it allowed me to take care of myself and keep myself in a good, healthy and positive place. Through staying positive, healthy and strong through doing all of these things allows me as a mommy to give and present my best self, give my very best and all to my daughter and my family thus achieving the fulfillment or embodiment of the statement ‘first, foremost and forever I am MaMa’ in other words I am ensuring I can do my best for my baby and my family so thus by doing that I’m putting my daughter and family first and foremost in all that I do.
In other ways that I have chosen and seen that I have used times or things to strived to being and continuing to be first, foremost and forever I am now MaMa. These things can also be found in the daily minute to minute way thinking in motherhood. It may be a day where I chose to focus on being in the moment and not focusing so much in my oh so very messy house that is driving me crazy and not cleaning because I know the moments of today won’t be here tomorrow. Also I may have played with my daughter or gone outside to play instead of staying in all day or maybe done so just a while longer. It could be the case that as I would and still do prefer to snuggle as long as possible with my daughter whether reading together or curled up watching a movie. It could be when I was in school as much as I could if I had a light week I would maybe not focus on my school work as much and enjoy being a mommy to my beautiful precious baby girl. Also I would when possible give up a day at Panera’s to be with the family making memories that would last a lifetime long after my school days were don, put away and over.
For me another most important and immense way that I fulfill this statement is being a wive before I am a Mama as much as possible. I know you jaw must be dropping and before your eyes pop out your head let me explain the purpose and intent in this statement. It is my job as a mother for daughter to give and provide her with a stable, strong, positive, good and healthy background, family and home life. Children crave and desire structure, security and stability and it is our jobs as mommies to give our babies these things. One of the best ways of doing this if not the very best way is to protect, defend and ensure their family unit and home life is protected, strong, stable, safe and secure.
It is true in our culture and world today there broken homes and we all come from different family units, structures, background and home lifes but even in the differing, varied forms of family units or home life of a child there are ways of still providing of achieving this goal that is a fundamental and vital part of ‘first, foremost and forever I am MaMa. For a single mom it might be focusing on her baby/babies, careful or her own choices, what she demonstrates and surrounding her baby/babies in the strength, security and stability in the family structure of the extended family unit. In the case of divorce the best way to still achieve and fulfillment of this statement is through protecting the relationship between the mom and dad of the child/children. The mom or dad should never put the children in the middle and use them as a tool or weapon or pit the themselves against the other parent. Also a parent should never ever represent the other parent in an negative or bad way or light. The two parents should always strive to present and demonstrate before the child/children a strong, respectful, kind, healthy, stable, good, positive united front and structure as a family model. In my case and journey as an individual, women, wife and mom I can to whatever it takes and at all costs no matter what to protect, defend, and grow my love, relationship and marriage with my husband my daughter’s father. Some examples of doing that is that my husband and I have at least one if not two dates nights a month sometimes weekly date nights. We ensure and keep open lines of communication about any and everything. The way, the how and what we communicate about has always been one of my favorite, treasured and cherished things about our relationship. We make each other and our marriage a priority and focus on each other and our marriage. Through doing that it teaches profound and invaluable lesson about family, respect, relationships, marriage, how to be a women, wife and mommy among numerous others. In doing this in conjunction with the other ways previously discussed that I have done and continue to do in my journey as a mommy I have and are giving my absolute very best to my daughter and are fulfilling the statement of first, foremost and forever I am MaMa.
As a mommy who has struggled with and wondered, more times than I can or care to count or would want to admit, how am I doing as a mommy and wonder how do I equate or quantify that. It is through these things that are a great meter for measuring my ability as a mommy and how well my motherhood journey is going. In and through all these tools, aspects and things such as taking my sips, breaks, breathes, MeO’clock times and catching my sex, sleep, soaks, snacks and sips in conjunction with the protection of my marriage and my daughters home and family life I am creating, allowing and achieving for myself being more centered, balanced and focused. Thus it is through all of this that I have and created more mountaintop mommy moments as opposed to mommy valley moments. When I have more and more mountaintop mommy moments and less and less mommy valley moments the scale or meter of measuring my motherhood is tipped or balanced in my favor and indicates that I am doing, providing and giving my very best to my daughter and family. Thus letting myself know that I have achieved and will continue to be first, foremost and forever MaMa. May we as mothers always make the choice and do the things that enable us to give and be our very best for our babies and family and thus being first, foremost and forever MaMa to our babies.