The play for power – the tug-a-wars of Motherhood

The play for Power – a tug a war of Motherhood

Pull, Pull, Pull, tug, tug, tug and hold on till you can’t hold on anymore does life ever seen to be a constant pulling and tugging a-war that you are involved in. It makes you wonder what are we playing for and trying to hold on so tightly as we pull and tug for dear life. Are we playing for keeps? Are we playing for love? Are we playing for sanity? Are we playing to win? Are we playing to money? Are we playing for honor or respect? In this tug-a-war in life what do we find ourselves tugging, pulling and playing for? I have also found in my journey as a mommy that I feel more times than I care to count as if I’m constantly pulling and tugging at things and it is at times not a journey but the war of Motherhood. I have ask myself as a women, wife and mommy what I’m a pulling, tugging, playing and fighting for in my motherhood.

In my motherhood as a woman, wife and mommy it feels as if I’m pulling and tugging to keep my head above water, this a constant reality when I was in school, at times. I feel that I am pulling and tugging to get my sanity back or hold on it. I feel it is a constant pulling and juggling to stay on top and ahead of the curve balls. I feel keeping and maintaining a clean house and home is a constant pulling and tugging between having or finding the time, keeping it under control and as soon it’s clean I turn around and it undone and messed up again and thus never ending pulling and tugging to provide a clean home for my babies and family. I feel constantly pulled and tugged at for demands of and on my time between family time, couple time, writing time, me time, quite time and other time. I feel tugged and pulled at to juggle all the hats, and roles I have in my life and motherhood. I feel like even with my babies being tugged and pulled at when they both want or need something and as if I’m always splitting my time. I feel at times there is a constant pulling and tugging war not just with me but also between my babies over space, tv time, toys, who’s turn it is, who had it first and so on. Thus it feel as if I’m constantly having to be a zebra to referee them, their own and my own endless tug-a-wars in my motherhood and life.

Also as a mommy of two babies it seems most evident that my babies are not just involved with a tug-a-war with each other at times but also in one of will with me and their daddy. I think this tug-a-war of wills between parent and child is the one of the most challenging if not the most challenging and difficult parts and tug-a-wars in parenting or parenthood. Even more so if not more the difficulty lies in the fact that this tug-a-war seems to be constant off and on, on going, and never ending between mother and child. The tug-a-war between mother/parent and child seems to have the potential for it to be in every aspect of the relationship regarding the play for power or will involved in this constant tug-a-war. It can be in the need to eat this specific choice in food or its meal time not play time. The tug-a-war can be played out in the morning routine, getting ready, bath time or bedtime routine. It can be found in struggling with getting homework or chores done. It can be with a two or three year old wanting to do it for him or herself. A tug-a-war of wills can clash over not giving in to doing what is asked or told of a child. It could be demonstrated through a battle of wills through an instance of a tantrum over not wanting to leave or go somewhere, over not getting a certain toy in a store or any other numerous things. Regardless of the reason, why or what for the tug-a-war the reality is the same in that it’s the constant pulling, tugging and fighting. As a mommy I have to wonder what will be the outcome of these constant tug-a-wars and what ground will ever be gained.

I have to ask myself what I’m fighting for in all of my pulling and tugging in this war I have found myself in at times since journeying as a mommy through motherhood. In answering this question I have to discern, decide, define and look at what I consider is worth playing and fighting for as a woman, wife and mother. Do I pull and tug for my sanity, to win and say I’m right, love, success, honor, respect, or to be the best or something else. In my seeking of the answer to this question as I continue my journey it can be found in what I want and choice is important or fundamentally significant or influential for me, my babies and family. In my pondering of these questions I have relied on what I feel and believe to be good qualities, attributes, characteristics and goals worth striving for and achieving. Upon much reflection of these questions, matters and concerns I as a woman, wife and mommy for myself, babies and family I wish to play and fight for the teaching of life lessons and building my babies character. I want my babies to learn, develop, grow into people who show and are respectful, kind, thoughtful, courageous, loyal, compassionate, merciful, forgiving, gracious, generous, courteous, strong, independent, confident, brave, fair, just and loving. I want my babies to be true to themselves and find and live their dreams. If it is in and through these tug-a-wars that my babies learn the skills, tools, abilities and traits needed to learn these lessons and build their character to allow for them to go forward journeying on to find their purpose and dreams then much has been achieved and the result of the tug-a-wars have been favorable or victorious.

In all of the pulling and tugging of the tug-a-wars whether involving my own tug-a-war as a woman, wife or mom, between my babies or the tug-a-war between me and my babies I have to guide my babies to a place of learning the lessons that will allow for the building of their character and the foundation to their future journey through life. I must have wisdom and discernment to know to choose which tug-a-wars to pick, fight and to play for and do so carefully. I must point and show the way to the essential and fundamentally needed learned lessons. I must help my babies see the point and goal of the lessons of the tug-a-wars. Through this process I must help my babies find their own way in their own journey through life. As long as I don’t ever lose sight of the point, goal and lesson to be leaned from the tug-a-wars I will not loose the value of the pulling, tugging or the tug-a-war themselves. I will be able to always through the pulling and tugging be able to help and teach my babies. This is another way that I can make lemonade out of the lemons in my motherhood or turn the valley moments into mountaintop moments for me and my babies. May I and we as mommies always strive to see the learning that can be gained through the tug-a-wars and use the teachable moments to be found in the tug-a-wars. May we always remember what we chose to playing and fighting for either for ourselves, our babies and our families.

About Heartfelt Meditations

I am a published author and was published in 2011. My passions in writing involves my journey through motherhood, my faith and my love for America and our history. I live in Louisiana bur am from Texas.
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