There is a great classic song from back in the day done by a group called The Rolling Stones and it is called “You can’t Always Get what You want and the course goes like this:
“You can’t always get what you want”
“You can’t always get what you want”
“ You can’t always get what you want”
“But if you try something you just might find you get what you need”
This song and lyrics remind of a great expression that I heard recently and fell in love with it. My neighbor told me she use to say to her boys when they were growing up “yes in people in hell want water too”. Okay so you might be saying but people need water. This is true but in the context of parenting and this expression she was saying people in hell may want water but there in hell so they can’t get it. There a couple of correlations to being mommies and for our babies we as mommies and our babies at times both experience the ‘I want what I want NOW’ in these moments of ‘I want what I want NOW moments’ our babies and as mommies have to understand and learn the truth of lyrics of the Rolling Stones song and of the expression of ‘People in Hell want water”
The moments of ‘I want what I want NOW’ moments for my babies can come in numerous and endless ways and instances throughout the daily routine. It could be I want to watch what I want to watch on tv or a movie NOW. One of my children could say I want a certain toy NOW. They both could say they want to eat NOW. They also could both say I want to go play at the park, go swimming or whatever NOW. Let’s be honest we as mommies have and get our own case of I want what I want and I want it NOW such as I want peace and quite Now. I want uninterrupted phone calls or conversations NOW. I want to go to the bathroom alone with no one with Now or take a bath uninterrupted NOW. I want to eat in peace NOW. Better still I want to nap Now or have mommy or me time NOW. In either case for us as mommies and our babies its really truly difficult and trying at times when we have the case of wanting what we want NOW!. Although it can be challenging, I’m equally guilty and need reminding myself, we each have great lessons of truth to be learn with great take away form the Rolling Stones and the expression of ‘People in Hell want water’
At this point you might be scratching your head wondering what is this insane women talking about. In either case I will gladly show and share the lessons of truth I see in these lyrical words and expression that are most valuable. Let’s start with the lessons of truth that our babies can learn. The lesson of truth that comes from ‘People in Hell want water” is that even though our babies aren’t in hell, of course we don’t want that and that isn’t what we are saying, but at times they may feel that way like when they can’t play when they want to or with what they wan to. Other times they can’t watch what want when they want. Basically in any case where they cant’t have or get their way when they want and if any of these cases they make a bad or red choice have to face the music or consequences of said choice such as timeout, going without what they want, being on restrictions or having to forego something they wanted to get or do because of their bad/red choices. In the case and instances they may think or feel that they are in hell. The lesson of truth of that is that even they aren’t getting their way (no water in hell) they are learning the lessons of life that they need to be happy, healthy, productive, successful, responsible, respectful, stable, good and contributing adults in our culture, society, the world and on their own life’s journey. They may not realize the truth of these lessons while are not receiving the water they think they need, want and are entitled too but as they learn, grow and journey on in their lives they see the truth and value of getting what the need and not what they want and will be better for it.
No worries ladies I didn’t forget about us and our lessons of truth we can learn from “You can’t always get what you want but if you try something you just might find you get what you need” I may not get what exactly what I want when I want as a mommy and it yes absolutely I get frustrated, mad, annoyed, stressed out and find it most challenging when I can’t get the oh so very much needed, naps, breaks, peace and quite, the uninterrupted chats, phone calls, bathroom or bather my mommy time among other things that I want what I want when I want like yesterday. The lesson for me has been as I journey along in my motherhood is that, yes I need reminding of this, that I have seen time and time again on a daily base is what I call the daily simple saving graces. I have gotten those when I needed them sometimes when I wanted them as well but often it was what I needed when I needed it the most. It could be I will get a night off to do my stuff or have time to myself when I was suppose or think I wasn’t going to and it was during a particularly hard day or week even. Another example could be when a girlfriend came over for a play date which gave me time with my girlfriend just not maybe my preference of a girls night out but it was what I needed in the sense it was still time with my girlfriend. Another example could if I’m tired or not feeling well I can’t get a day to rest uninterrupted like I would prefer but I do get my babies being sweet by either playing nicely and quietly on their own while rest or relax on the couch or they watch tv together while I lay on the couch. Are any of these my perfect and ideal preference of what I want when I want no but it is the simple daily saving grace of what i need in that moment of my day as a mommy. In those moments of getting what I need are the very things at times that can be the saving grace i need as a mommy that help me feel and stay centered, focused, balanced and keep me out of the valleys of my motherhood and on top of my mommy mountains.
In either case of our babies not getting the water they want or us as mommies finding what we need in our moments of simple daily saving graces we learn that there is more in life then getting our way all the time. We learn that it is better getting what we need then always having what we want when we want NOW. We learn patience and how to be patient although difficult, frustration and challenging. We learn that there is more to this life then instant gratification and that good things come to those who wait. Do I need help remembering these lessons in my days and journey as a mommy yes I do and that’s okay. Learning and growing in these valuable truths and lessons I can help teach my babies valuable life lessons and I learn how to trust and focus on my daily saving graces that I need as a mommy. In my journey as a mommy I know that when I take the needed simple daily saving graces that come my way when I need them in my day and journey I feel sane, balanced, focused and centered as a mommy and I can be the mommy I want and need to be for my babies and in my journey as a mommy. May I always seek the daily simple saving graces that I am given and blessed with in my daily journey as a mommy. In our continuing journeys as mommies may we remember and teach the lessons of truth to be found in song by The Rolling Stones and no water in hell. May we always have the knowledge, courage and strength to teach these life lessons as we continue on our journey through motherhood.