When I was growing up my family went to church and for most of my school years and education before college was private Christian school. You can probably imagine that I can from a very religious background did the whole Sunday school, church each week, youth group the whole works. One of the stories I was taught in Sunday growing is found in the new Testament of the Bible (The Gospel of Luke 10: 38 – 42) and the story involves the sisters of one of the closest friends of Jesus who was named Lazarus and his sisters Martha and Mary. My point of mentioning this relates to the sisters in this story. Before you judge this chapter and skip ahead to the next I have a point I promise and will get to it and how it comes into play in our journey as mamas.
The story goes that Jesus was coming over to their house and so there was a lot of preparation and things to do. Martha was very busy and focused on getting everything ready and was upset because Mary wasn’t helping her at all and Martha was left to deal with all the preparation and work on her own. Meanwhile Mary was relaxing, visiting and hanging out with Jesus not concerned for anything at all or no thought of her sister who was doing all the work on her own with no help. Sound familiar anyone? When Martha brought this to Jesus’s attention He basically chastised or repressanded Martha for focusing on all her work and told her she should be out here with them and do as her sister Mary was doing. Regardless of your backdrop the point is still much the same and has much relevance to our journey as mamas who are traveling through motherhood. So often as mamas we are beyond busy doing the work of motherhood that we struggle to do the true role of being a mama which is the very point of our motherhood. I know for me I so very often find myself struggling in between the worlds of Martha and Mary in my own journey as a mama.
In understanding the relevance this has to our journey as mamas we need to understand and identify who Mary and Martha are as women. Martha is a women who is a servant and serves her friends and family. Martha has the personality of a beaver and type A and maybe she is OCD and perfectionist. Martha very well could be a task/task personality who is goal oreitned, a doer, a planner and list maker. Martha is also a busy woman who is focused on her lists, work and goals and a worker bee that is much distracted by all of her lists, work and chores. Marhat is also most likely a worrier who arguably has healthy portions of guilt that accompanies her through her busy and overwhelming days. She also most likely
finds herself stressed, frazzled and tired who meets herself coming and going with her emerous and very full and overflowing plate. Martha’s perspective is more focused on the here and now, what is right in front of her and that of the daily practical need or picture.
I know not to throw a stone in my glass house for I’m guilty as charged and this absoluelty is me without a doubt. I identify much with Marhat for most of my life has necessitate that I be cut from this same cloth as Martha which much seems from my disality. I have always been all of these things and so I get and understand Martha who she is, where she id coming form and I get her and feel her pain and struggle. My joureny as a mama has been no different. As I have been journeying though my motherhood for 8 years now I have seen and learned much of just how much is expected and required of me as a mama. I have learned being a mama has brought with it many and endless jobs, roles, tasks and responsiblies. I’m sure as you read you this you are taking and say oh yes for sure don’t we know it and you are preaching to motherhood choir. I think one of the hardest things in my own motherhood is juggling and balancing all the new balls, jobs, tasks and roles that comes with being a mama. I mean as a mommy I and we are cooks, maids, run laundry mats, social secateries, accounts/book keepers, taxi drivers, nurses, teachers, coaches, counselors, referees, finders and keepers of any and everything and everything in between and so much more. It is a 24/7 job and most day there isn’t enough time in the 24/7 to do all those jobs and tasks that we do as mamas who have to live in the world of Martha more times than not if not all the time we feel we call Maratha’s world our home as mamas.
Now that we have defined and identified the world and person of Martha lets look at understanding Mary’s world. Mary is a woman who most likely is a care free, and a free spirit. Mary comes across as bing content to relax, enjoy life and living in the moment. Mary could be describe as an effusive, passionate person who jumps right in and acts with her heart without hesitation or any thought. It could be said that Mary soaks up and savor the moment and be in the here and now. Mary might be a persons who seems to savors, cherishes and treasures the moments and her journey. Mary is caring, loving and who is a relationship/ relationship personality. Mary’s has a point of view that is focused on more of taking things as they come, care free and don’t sweat the small stuff. For its best to always stop and smell the roses, live for the here and now and seize the day.
I so often find myself feeling and being so jealous of Mary and wishing and desiring much to be more like Mary. I desperately long for and seek ways to be more like Mary in my journey as a mama. For I know what Mary knows to be true in life and especially as mama. The time I have with my precious babies is priceless, fleeting and a treasure that is so very slipping by just a ands of a beach that slip thought my toes and fingers. The sand of time equally are sipping by and passing through me and my babies.
Thus after indenting, defining, understanding, comping the people and worlds of Mary and Martha. I must confess this has always and forever been a hard one for me and ruffled my feathers a bit. This ruffles my feathers for several reasons for one thing I felt like as women the tale of Mary and Martha is a story of opposing character and identities as women with differing perspectives and points of views that are pitted against each other. I feel as if the way it’s and has been taught one point of view or perspective Made out to be or made feel that it is right and the other wrong. In the position being presented of Mary being correct in the story it seems that at times the idea of the Marthas having to do what has to be done and attending to business that can’t be relegated and the value to be found in this position has been taken for granted in some ways. I also have thought that the Martha’s are needed and can’t be ignored or the world world stop working and turning if there weren’t Marthas in it and that many times that seems to be forgotten. But by the same token the value and lessons that come from the Marys are equally have a purpose that seem to be forgotten, negotiated or dismissed by the Marathas. There are many lessons of value that equally come both the world’s of Mary and Martha.
It seems that there is question that needs to be considered in my journey as a mama which is how do i balance the world of Martha and Mary. This is a a most challenging one for me and I struggle with this one a great deal for I’m absolutely by personality a Martha 100% through and through but I seek much and wish to have the ability to be more like Mary and have a heart that desires and ekes to be more like Mary. Maybe the key to answering this question is found not in pitting these perspectives and worlds against each other. Furthermore maybe we come to the answer by finding and seeing the value that equally both Mary and Martha have for us in our own journeys as mamas. May I can work on taking what I can use and learn from both worlds and balancing it in my world an journey as a mama. In trying to balance these worlds as we journey through our motherhood maybe the Martha’s, such as myself, ofter the Mary mamas our valuable lessons of planning, orderliness, organization, striveng to focus on tasks and goals and resume the chaos. On the other hand even though yes we have to absolutely have to be and live in our Martha wold for our babies and families let us Martha’s not forger the value in our the world of Mary. In dong this maybe the Mary can help us Martha’s be less like Martha and remind us of what is truly important as a mama. For Mary serves as well in her own way. By being in the moment and sizing the day Mary is severing her family. Moreover less I not forget that there is much immense value in value in being a Mary for my babies, my family and myself.
In my own journey through my motherhood may I strive works on finding and keeping the balance between my own Martha and Mary world. May I also do my due diligence in my Martha world of working hard, providing and caring for my babies and family in all the ways we do as mamas. For me may I also I never forget to strive to spend much much more and more often enter into and enjoy my Mary world. As a mama to my precious babies may I in my Mary world stop to smell the roses of motherhood and not just seize the days but the minutes, hours, weeks, months, seasons and years of my motherhood. May I always and forever cherish and treasure the moments and memories and tuck them aways in my mommy heart as a scrapbook of my journey as a mama. May I and we strive to strike the balance of the worlds of Mary and Martha always as a mamas by doing our best for our families by severing equally well as Martha of attending to and caring for them all the while of cherishing, treasuring my babies and family. May I and we always and forever as we travel through motherhood never forget to soak up every moment of journey as mamas.